Wednesday, April 25, 2007

The Plea

I do not want to reach the end of life
And say that I had not liv’d
(So quick am I to look back at it all and count it for naught--
Will you help me live it here?)
I heard the song of a robin today
So early in the false dark dawn
It’s liquid voice coaxing the newborn sun
And ceased its ablutions before the light fully came
It’s namesake, an application to understand.
To what have I an owning of purpose
My Love and children, aye and aye,
But more—to birds, and sky and trees and all
Of things, which quickened by numen,
Both articulately and noiselessly rejoicing.
Perhaps I’ll regret a thing or two
Times missed or omitted due to hybristic boyishness or sin
But God, He knows about these things, And laughingly
He’ll sit with me and tell me how He was once like I
Life is one eternal round,
‘n eternal quintessence of things which be and were and can
Spirit and constitution, wreathed together, all touching
All connected, all of our souls together.


Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Musings About the Big Two-Niner...

So I turn one year from thirty in just a few hours...My last time alloted to me by God on this earth as a twenty-something (go look up Jamie Cullum and the self-same song title if you want to hear soem great musicianship). Where to begin? I didn't believe I'd be where I am today, on the road to sucess smack dab in the American Dream, 2.5 children, a dog, several bikes, a car, a motorcycle, a washer and dryer, and gadgets enough to shake a large-ish stick at.

Waxing pilosopical? Maybe. I just watched "In Pursuit of Happyness" starring Will Smith (no ailens pop out or get punched, blown up, etc), and the movie struck me and fell into the pantheon of other select films titled: "I never thought I'd watch it, but I did and I liked it". The trailers were sappy, the plot felt, well, dull. The idea of it just seemed pitiful. But the film delivered with some real power to me--Will Smith showed a depth and realism that was touching. The director, an Itallian named Gabrielle Muccino (find out about him here: ) was selected for his emotionally touching work by Smith personally. Long story short, they met, they worked together, Muccino directing Smith and the outcome producing something exemplary. Just watch the features on your DVD to catch a great bit of vita and Sognio Americano!

Yes I am living the American Dream. I dip myself into it each and every day, wrapping it about myself and wafting sweet smelling scents it's bounty. I live a life that has been juxstaposed by the sheer apathy and entitlement of those around who only feel the need to get more, more, more. I am in a land blessed by many accounts, a land that tries to adhere to democracy and truth, which tries to put down opression, yet is not perfect. A land where families have 3 and 4 car garages, more clothing and food than we need, all the education anyone motivaed to get it can, a nation which tries to live by peace.

It's 3:40 am, and I am not making myself clear anymore. Yet I wanted to write something, so I could give a tiny thanks to my ancestors who left hearth and farm and everything known to travel here in search of The American Dream. Your jigs and reels stir my soul, and I feel as if I almost could touch you now if I were only able to strech out my arm just so--your names feel so quick to want to come to my tongue, yet the words do not form. To your bones I sing a song, to your spirits I offer my grattitude, and to who you are I offer what I am and can be.


Saturday, April 07, 2007

Going Postal

So this am marks 60.25 hrs in 6 days of work. Holy overtime batman! The USPS tracks their week a bit differently or tomorrow I'd hit the 70 hr mark in 1 week...that is a lot of work!

I was at work tonight in a bit of a snit, tired and more tired, letting "fatigue rule my life" as my older brother Dave Blair would put it. I was cussing up a storm at the DBCS #2 and the unfairness of the way my break had worked out--it shook down something like this: there were three folks who called in sick or absent today, and we were quite short handed. I was scrambling after lunch to clean the 150 or so bins assigned to this particular run in order to go on break (as the machine would continue to run and no one would be sweeping it, just one individual to load--all 32 k per hr, 8 k for you math whizzes). I went to break to enjoy my momentary leap into the cold war and The Hunt For Red October, not really thinking about what I'd be coming back to.

It was mayhem.

Do you know those folks who seem to think they are doing a fine job at whatever they are doing, yet they are really not? I think of them as stuck in the "bubble of self delusion"--a nasty place to be and the only way out of it is to pop it themselves. Well, the fellow loading was "in the bubble." The machine, my machine, was smattering mayhem all over my well-tended work area. Yes I am jealous of my work area, and yes, I do periodically urinate on the corners of the machine to mark boundaries and keep the other clerks at bay. :)

Now, I do not know where the fine line between tourettes and rapid controlled cursing is at, but I imagine I was flirting with it. I spoke a few choice words and then a few more, working my way through the Jayrubler-Coughs model (it's similar to the Kuebler-Ross model, Google it sometime), and eventually accepting the inevitable. This was a pile of &*%#, and I was in that self-same pile of &*%#, and I'd have to dig my way out of it (and so I did).

I came home this am and read the blog of Lynn, my Father-In-Law and it was right up the alley for today's exploits, yet on the other end of the spectrum. It's a good read, and you can find it here (The posting I reference is Responsibility):

My mother would say "When the student is ready, the master will appear", and so it would seem I took a message from his posting. Thank you Lynn!

And to all you day-walkers, I wish you all a good night. 0650, and I am heading to bed

Peace, Jay